Friday, November 17, 2006

Popularity at Work

A recent Columbia University study showed that “jobs, pay raises and promotions are more apt to be awarded based on a worker's charisma than on his or her academic background or professional qualifications.” Really? A research study was conducted to point this out? Duh! I’ve known this for years.

I worked for a company where there was this guy who, for some strange reason, was loved by management; despite the fact that he was a complete screw up. I’m not lying when I say he personally messed up three projects. His complete incompetence messed up two projects and his indiscretions with a female project team member messed up the other. Despite these set backs, his boss and the company in general loved him. He could do no wrong. He was a fun-loving, jolly guy who everyone seemed to like. In grade school he was probably the class clown that always got in trouble but was also the teacher’s favorite.

So, what’s a cube monkey to do? Well, if you aren’t attractive, hip, popular, or witty I have some very practical business and success advice. Get plastic surgery. If you are fat, bald, sagging in all the wrong places, or just plain ugly, go to the doctor. I’ve watched these plastic surgery shows and they can perform miracles. Forget make-up and toupees. Plastic surgery is the answer.

If you aren’t popular, I suggest that you start hanging out with people who are. Take notes on how they schmooze. Look at their body language, how they use touch at the perfect time to boost the other person’s positive perception of them. If you aren’t witty, invest in a good joke book and take comedy lessons. Many community colleges have acting and stand-up comedy classes.

Of course I am kidding on many of these fronts. Don’t be someone who you aren’t. I will agree that there are some people who can be complete incompetent boobs yet do no wrong. However, I think being likeable and popular is about being fair, compassionate, trust worthy, reliable and friendly. If you sit at your desk all day and grimace when someone asks a question, you won’t be very popular. However, if you are the type to lend a helping hand, take time to listen, etc., your “likeability” will go up substantially.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I work with a bunch of jackasses that only really talk to those that are part of their group. And they are some of the lowest level employees in the company. They all love each other but if you aren't one of them, they don't know how to talk to you. I tried being friendly but now realize what a bunch of morons they are. To any one reading this that is facing the same thing, have pride in yourself and don't give in. Don't try to be popular with nitwits. I will never kiss their asses. They can kiss mine!